Thursday, August 4, 2011

The Drug Of Champions

I am currently sitting in my parents back yard writing this, the warm winter sun on my back and my fathers budgies chirping very loudly, so loud I can't concentrate.

I spent the night here last night to look after my Mum, she is a little better. Monday night we were all sure it was her last. But if you know my Mum is a fighter, she isn't ready to let go yet. She is a real champion. Thankfully.
She had been weened off her Dexamethasone last week and it was catching up with her. It's such an amazing drug for cancer patients, but the side affects are just so horrible so they can't stay on it for long and have to weened on and off it. It's basically a steroid. Max was amazing on it, he would have a huge appetite which was just so nice to see when he was turning to skin and bones. Wiki tells me "it's use is widespread among prostitutes in Bangladesh in spite of the dangers, because it helps them develop fat easily, an attractive feature in this poor country." So you learn something new everyday. My Mum is weening back onto it again and that is what has given her a bit of life back.


I am back home now, my sister looked after Boo and took him to daycare for me yesterday, then in the afternoon we switched and she stayed with my Mum last night. Apparently she had a terrible anxiety attack, the worst she has ever had.  Her breathing is atrocious, I have never heard anything like it, she is struggling for breath with makes her anxious. We had been waiting for a bed at the palliative care hospice so she and we can get some respite. We finally got the call this morning. My sister is taking her as I type.

I think it's the best place for her at the moment. She has become very forgetful, so taking her meds on time has been a real task. She gets very breathless just getting up to go to the toilet, everything is a challenge for her. She can't be left alone. My Dad is an emotional wreck he just cries and weeps. Understandably. But it's not doing my mother any good seeing him like this.

It was nice to spend some quality time with my Mum, without Boo. Whilst he was there the other day he pushed her medi alert necklace button. The alarm went off so when they called to check on my Mum, my sister had to tell them that we were just testing the service. Ooops! She loves having him around but I couldn't look after her and Boo at the same time. Her medication makes her doze in and out, but she still manages to knit. My Mum she is a Champion.


Anonymous said...

Ooh! Your poor mum Vee, I feel so sad and sorry for her and your dad, so sad to hear this happening must be heartbreaking to see them like this.
So glad you have been able to spend some special time with her and your dad.
Hopefully the Steroids will give your mum some comfort, such a lovely photo of her knitting.
You, your mum, dad and family are in my thoughts and prayers during this difficult time.
Hugs to you all.
Mary xx

MrsSpock said...

Sending many hugs to you all!

maytey said...

Thinking of you xxxx

HubeiMama said...

My god, Vee. So much for you to bear - my heart just aches for you.

Thinking of you and your family.

Linda said...


Sorry you have to go through this at all, but especially so soon after Max. Thinking of you.

Anonymous said...

Thinking of you and your family xoxo

Anonymous said...

Thinking of you.

stink-bomb said...

nothing but love and hugs.


Serenity said...

Been thinking of you and your family nearly nonstop. Sending you love from the other side of the globe.


Pundelina said...

Oh Vee, my poor dear Vee. It's all so hard for you :( I am keeping you and your Mum (and your poor Dad) in my thoughts. I hope, ... I'm not sure what I hope for really, I just wish it wasn't so soon for you, so awful, so painful. To be dealing with cancer in another loved one, it's just so very unfair.


Bea said...

I love your photo.

I am... I guess I am glad your mum has a hospice place to go to. I am glad she has one. I am still sorry she needs one.

Fighting for breath can be quite frightening. I know it frightened me when I was breathless with the OHSS, and your mum must have it a lot worse at present. Hopefully the steroids do their trick (I had no idea about the prostitutes either, there you go) and she feels a bit brighter and healthier with them on board.

Wishing your father strength, too. I can't imagine.

I should also say that I've just posted an entry on my blog I should warn you about before you read it. PB was asking about Boo's Dadda.


lparsons15 said...

Thinking of you guys! Glad to hear she is doing a bit better.

Delenn said...

And still she knits. Wow. I bet you are so proud of your strong momma. Giving you all big Hugs!

Tara said...

sending prayers your way

Lut C. said...

I can't imagine how hard this must be for all of you, though the description you gives a good explanation.

I'm thinking of you all.