I know why I don't come back here, it's because I have too much to say and I don't know where to start, so I become overwhelmed in my own thoughts and I think no I just can't do it.
Perhaps I need to close up this blog. I don't know.
Maybe I should give you some bullet points.
- Single parenting is hard. I am tired. Boo is just gorgeous but he is a very stubborn and determined. He is cheeky but beautiful and so loving it melts my heart. But some days are really tough.
- My Dad has been diagnosed with mild Alzheimer. He has become horrible, I know it's not him it's the disease but it is heartbreaking. He is breaking our family unit apart. He has become paranoid and delusional, changing locks to the house twice even when none of us have a key. We take him food he throws it out because he thinks we are poisoning him. I could talk about this for ages but it's upsetting and I don't have the energy today.
- I miss Max.
- I miss my Mum.
- I am still trying to build up my photography business, I am passionate about it, most days but some days I just lose the passion. I need to make money.
- I am trying to look for part time work, without success.
- I am seeing a psychologist. She is helping me work through all of the above. I know I will get there... Slowly.
6 comments:
Oh Vee, I didn't realise how bad your father had become. It's so scary when people start losing their sense of rationality like that.
I wish you strength.
And good luck in the job search.
That is a lot on your plate. Just sending a hug.
hang in there, that is quite the heavy and hard list. I'm glad you're getting some help. Hoping for some strength and peace your way. You so deserve it.
Glad to see you blog, I'm sorry to hear about your dad's struggles :(
Glad to see you, even in bullet points. That is a lot for you to take on. ((Hugs))
Oh Vee.
I'm so glad to see an update from you but I'm so sad that it's one filled with such angst and sadness. I can feel it coming through the screen in your words Vee.
In regards to your Dad, have you had him assessed for inhome care? You can get a referral from his Dr for an ACAT assessment or just ring ACAT up directly and get them to come out and assess him for receiving care eg personal care, social support, meal prep etc that would take some of the stress off you guys and carers coming in would [usually] have had dementia specific training, which is helpful when caring for clients with Alzheimers/Dementia.
Much love to you Vee xxx
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